Can men and women be just friends? The answer is a big “NO.” A group of scientists have said that we do not understand each other and, in the end, someone ends up crying.
One of the most controversial issues which has been bothering the mankind since civilization, can men and women be friends and just friends? A lot of people think about it and at last people give answers or they tend to believe what they see in their environment.
Now, that science has finally been able to answer the question after a group of researchers from the University of Wisconsin, USA, dedicated their efforts to get us out of doubt. They have presented a study called “ Benefit or burden?Attraction in cross-sex friendship”.
According to Abril Bleske-Rechek, the psychologist at the head of the research group that has studied the relationship between men and women, “men and women have a very different perception of the messages they receive from the opposite sex. This, especially in the case of men, leads them to misunderstand the signals.”
Hence, this study published in the “Journal of Social and Personal” concludes that friendship between individuals of different sex is impossible to verify that one of the parties, if not both, eventually develop a different degree of sexual attraction, after analyzing the friendship of almost a hundred university students.
The young people who were part of the research were asked – first separately and then in front of their friend – what was the level of attraction they felt for the other person, giving three options: “no attraction”, “moderate attraction” And “extreme attraction”. Already during the study phase, factors such as, the way they were known, the time spent as friends, the frequency and degree of interaction, or the emotional experiences shared by both were taken into account.
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It has been found that in particular everyday attitudes, such as the situation in which the man lends a woman the jacket when it is cold, while she perceives the man only as the good friend, but the man shows a clear sign of the attraction he feels.
In this regard, the research shows that it is men who feel a greater attraction for their friends, with the feeling, moreover, that this feeling is reciprocated. However, they often interpret the gentle attitudes of their peers as a direct consequence of the relationship of friendship that binds them, which makes them less prone to misunderstanding with their friends.
During the research, the psychologists who were part of this detected that when men send sexual messages to a woman friend, she usually interprets them as a sign of sympathy, whereas when they are especially sympathetic, they interpret their behavior as a first sign of sexual attraction.
What’s More Beyond Science?
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Michael Nast, author of The Generation of the Inappropriate, or No Compromise has recently put the focus on the millennial generation, which he defines in a vast majority as emotionally disabled who understands love as a “self-assertion to reaffirm himself or herself “. Nast says, men and women can be friends, yes, but “only if the other is a thistle.”
A debatable idea that later arises indicating that the friendship between people of different sex is only possible when sexuality is suppressed, when neither of them has hopes of maintaining a loving relation, coinciding in some way with the theses that guarantee that Friendly relationships between friends committed to third parties are much more settled.
Though, no science can give boundaries of relationships between men and women, it is in your hands how you will see your male friend or female friend.